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@*Sian* wrote:
@pikey wrote:
:lol: I s’pose not. Good to know you’re doing well. Tell t’other half ‘scene’.
Chav!!!
Hey tiz… you not heard of contraception? :wink:
Heard of it Sian, just didn’t use it. :lol: :lol: :lol:
@dizzyer blonde wrote:
:shock: just wanted to know if any1 noticed i was gone lol
Actually, i DID notice, but didn’t want to say anything! :)
I also had a dog called Ruff, and he went missing two years ago! Police said that there were no leads lol. :lol:
@james Belfast wrote:
Has anyone ever had any problems with having their bees kidnapped? I’d be well gutted if it ever happened to me. I love my bees, even though their legs stink of pollen and I suffer from hay-fever, I would be gutted if anything ever happened to my bees. Anyway, I’ve never had my bees kidnapped but i know someone who has. Woke up in the morning and there they were…gone! He was absolutely gutted. A mate of mine used to own a banjo and ride on the trams.
This stuff is Heart – Breaking! (Where’s Tommy and his views when you need him?)
I remember when we had a break – In, and someone stole my jar of Toe – Nail clippings! Insurance company wouldn’t pay up either! I also had a mate who played a banjo, and like your mate, he had nothing whatsoever to do with my sad, sad news!
My advice would be to get photographs of your BEES, and paste them to walls etc, you never know see, as someone may know something! Big crime these days isn’t it? Bee Knapping! Ronnie Biggs, eat your heart out!
@soulie wrote:
1. In the company of females, intercourse should be referred to as:
A good old S H A G
2. You should make love to a woman for the first time only after you’ve both shared:
your fantasies
3. You time your orgasm so that:
you can still go to the pub!
4. Spending the whole night cuddling a woman you’ve just had sex with is:
Stupid, I mean, just move onto the next!
5. Your girlfriend says she’s gained five pounds in the last month. You tell her that it is:
GREAT, cos you can buy that pint you’ve been wanting for the past week!
6. You think today’s sensitive, caring man is:
ME
7. Foreplay is to sex as:
Security for the woman!
8. Which of the following are you most likely to find yourself saying
at the end of a relationship?S H I T, I have to start W A N K I N G again!
9. A woman who is uncomfortable watching you masturbate:
Is an old woman walking home from Bingo, not aware you’re behind the trees ready to pop – out. (Excuse the pun)
10. Passionate, spontaneous sex on the kitchen floor is:
Good, if you own a Vileda super – mop. Not only that, but the kettle is near too!
Evaluating Results:
If you answered “A” more than 7 times, check your pants to make sure you haven’t come yet!If you answered “B” more than 7 times, check into therapy, you’re littler than little!
If you answered “C” more than 7 times, “YOU DA MAN!” (Is what Tommy says when he’s being taken up da back un) :lol:
What kind of deals do you do Mary? Tesco’s are doing two tens for a fiver, can you beat that? :wink:
@tommy-toxen wrote:
@kangawallafox wrote:
I’m onto you ya c*nt!
You have more than one username here and the other one isn’t RS :wink:
who? i wish someone would tell me these things, just say the username!
Admit it Toxen, you HAVE been using other names, to try and lure men into your wicked world! I caught you out, and you KNOW it too!
For the benefit of the board users, and for your own personal safety, Tommy Toxen has also been known as:
The Daddy! :shock:
BrokebackMountainLad! :?
DonkeyDick (Which makes you liable for prosecution, seeing as that title is actually Mis – Leading!)
Oh,… And not forgetting, the name: RogerYouIfYouTurnYourBackQuickly!
@pikey wrote:
:lol: I s’pose not. Good to know you’re doing well. Tell t’other half ‘scene’.
“Scene” ??
@pikey wrote:
What, like children who name themselves after wanky films from the eighties, you mean? :D
Never heard of a child called Lassie!!! :?
