Vignettes from the Business World

“As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building using individual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday and employees will receive their cards in two weeks”
(Microsoft Corporation)

“What I need is a list of specific unknown problems we will encounter”
(Lykes Lines Shipping)

“Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule. No one will believe you solved this problem in one day. We’ve been working on it for months. Now, go act busy for a few weeks and I’ll let you know when it’s time to call them”
(Minnesota Mining & Manufacturing)