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  • #1112890

    Mizzy Mizzed One Her Stomachs Like A Gone Off Scone

    She Went With A Cyber Don And Now With Nemesis He has Gone

    You Live Like A Pancake All Lost And Flat

    You Are An Embarrasment Not So Fat

    So You Bring Me All Your Mizz Mizzery

    Your Life Is AScrounger And Your Free

    So Jump On A Plane With No Brain

    In Your Room ALONE With Your Cocaine

    You Know Your One Black Dress

    Makes You Look Such A Mess :whistle:

    #1112892
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8B4BdAs0h4
    #1112902

    Wonder what will happen when Ozzie Ozbourne eventually kicks the bucket………………..will we have to suffer endless repeats of the Ozbournes?……….don’t have a go at me…you’r just Paranoid….or if you’r taking a selfie in them days…you’r just Polaroid…LMAO

    Said the camera man to the model….i’ll be back in a flash….LMAO

    1 member liked this post.
    #1112912

    Mizzy Mizzed One Her Stomachs Like A Gone Off Scone

    She Went With A Cyber Don And Now With Nemesis He has Gone

    You Live Like A Pancake All Lost And Flat

    You Are An Embarrasment Not So Fat

    So You Bring Me All Your Mizz Mizzery

    Your Life Is AScrounger And Your Free

    So Jump On A Plane With No Brain

    In Your Room ALONE With Your Cocaine

    You Know Your One Black Dress

    Makes You Look Such A Mess :whistle:

    Critique and explanation of your crappy attempt at poetry.

    1. Stomach reference to me having surgery and it being damaged I imagine.

    2. Yeah Nems dun take ma chat mayan, I couldn’t compete with her pics.

    3. Pancake reference for my low moods when I cry a lot probably

    4. Not so fat – make up your mind

    5. I bring you nothing but misery yes I tend to do that with all the men I’ve ever dated.

    6. I am free? true I don’t charge

    7. I go away a lot hence reference to plane, I often have no brain that’s true I dated you

    8. I don’t take cocaine so it was just a convenient rhyming word maybe if I did I’d be thinner

    9. Actually I have 5 black dresses I threw away the red one as you liked me in it

    10. I look like a mess – didn’t bother you before though did it sausage.

     

    Thank you for the poem but you’re a much better troll than a poet.

    Your = you’re

    Embarrassment*

    You don’t need to use sentence case,  a capital letter at the start is basically all you need.  Titles of places can have both the first words capitalised for example Camber Sands, Bogna Regis (like the places you go to when you go on ‘holiday’)

    When you re-read what you’ve written put in commas for when you want the line to flow better, see it as a way to briefly pause,  and maybe use an exclamation mark to impress on you readers you are making a point for example:

    He couldn’t stop trolling talking and obsessing over her she’s such a fat cow

    to

    He couldn’t stop trolling talking and obsessing over her, she’s such a fat cow!

    Or even

    He couldn’t stop trolling talking and obsessing over her – she’s such a fat cow.

    Oh and when you wish to take the mickey out of someone you could use these ‘ ‘ ‘.

    For example:

    He say’s he’s ‘over’ me but keeps talking about me, commenting on my threads and has even written a ‘poem’ about me.

    That’s me basically saying I didn’t think that it was much of a poem.

    You don’t have to be smart to ‘write’ – you have proved that!  I hope my few tips have helped you.  Lets see some progress if you try again!

    :mail:

    I don’t actually expect any future comments, I know you are on ‘holiday’ in Marmaris.  You made a thread about it and included pictures so it must be ‘true’.

    I bet you are on the beach as I type this soaking up the sun in your adidas shorts and matching top complaining about the price of ice cream and shouting at your mother down the phone cos she topped up your giffgaff for you wrong.

    All ‘sour grapes’ – of course!

    :bye:

     

    • This reply was modified 5 years, 10 months ago by  Artful Dodger.
    #1112922

    Good god how much more tripe will these boards allow !

     

    2 members liked this post.
    #1112951

    As much as Rose likes to diss…..LMAO

    #1112970

    Good god how much more tripe will these boards allow !

    Ok Rosie start a thread.  Post up your doggie or your hamster, it could be a news item, it could be celebrity gossip hey it could even be about your pot plants.  Provide pics.

    Rose the boards are public.

    Own your own space.

    Test the boards and see how much tripe the boards will allow.

    Instead of bitching about other peoples posts why dont you stand tall and be a real woman and post your own thread. hey i will start one for you darling x

     

Viewing 7 posts - 41 through 47 (of 47 total)

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