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Just a poem that jumped into my head not about anyone in particular (coughs)
The Disgruntled Woman
I am throwing all my toys out I am stroppy – and I’m mean
Ive gone from naught to crappy there was nothing in between
I never got my own way so im grumpy and I’m snappy
So now I’m going to bash you all just by using the lappy
Im self centred and im needy and want all your love on me
And if Im not placated, just see how arsey I can be
I am immature and childish and insist I get my way
If I don’t get what im after I will sulk then then go away
Im unreasonable and sarcastic im a cow when I am cross
You cant take me to your fairground I will EAT your candy floss
I want all of your attention and to suck you til youre dry
If you don’t give me what im after I will STOMP MY FEET then cry
Il be jumping up and down in rage not be a happy bunny
I will swear and curse and moan and winge it wont be very funny
I will dominate beligerate be like a stalker whose on acid
I’ll bore you underscore you and you’ll be forever FLACID
I want to own you and rehome you and to tie you to my bed
It wont take you long to realise – im screwed up in the head
Its better to avoid me Im a show off and I’m dence
And you probably haven’t noticed that I DON’T MAKE ANY SENSE
I am watching I am watching and I never ever go
I will send you pictures of myself (like my very wonky toe)
I’ll pretend im not in love with you because im in denial
Ill forget how much im into you whilst soaking others with my bile
Ill be unfriendly wherever possible and spoil every bodys fun
Will send you pictures of my cleavage and may even flash my bum
Im a scary witch and such a bitch – annoying you is my hobby
And you’ll lie awake you will not sleep planning where to hide my body
3 members liked this post.
How about one of my poems….
It’s called “My Penny”
There is a penny in my toilet,
It lies there so destitute,
I do want to pick it out,
Before it goes down the chute!It gets shinier with every visit,
The Queen’s head full of majesty,
Will picking it out be worth it,
Or is the flip-side a travesty?!Don’t poo-pooh my precious coin,
It means a lot to me,
Courage will make us lastly rejoin,
And then I can plop guilt-free!By Rob
1 member liked this post.
I fu**ing loved that rob
Glad you liked it. Here is another. It’s called….
THE ALTERNATIVE TOY STORY
I started life as a teddy bear,
But every night I change,
I was a Barbie with long blonde hair,
Then an Action Man on the rifle range.Being a train set was quite fun,
A Go-kart was even better,
As a beachball I enjoyed the sun,
I’ve been everything in your Santa letter.It is a very strange thing,
And causes great confusion,
I wonder what this dawn will bring,
Oh bummer! I’m a Whoopee Cushion!By Rob
Glad you liked it. Here is another. It’s called….
THE ALTERNATIVE TOY STORY
I started life as a teddy bear,
But every night I change,
I was a Barbie with long blonde hair,
Then an Action Man on the rifle range.Being a train set was quite fun,
A Go-kart was even better,
As a beachball I enjoyed the sun,
I’ve been everything in your Santa letter.It is a very strange thing,
And causes great confusion,
I wonder what this dawn will bring,
Oh bummer! I’m a Whoopee Cushion!By Rob
1 member liked this post.
Very good lol
Rob please post up more poems I like yours.
There was a guy called rob He was a right?? He used to be funny Now he’s just ??
Sairs is so funny and Witty Sairs is so warm n cuddly just like a Kitty Sairs is fun and makes us Smile Sairs is cute and Fragile Sairs can be so cunning and Great Sairs let’s go out and Celebrate Thanks For Being A True Friend!!!! Donna
1 member liked this post.
Thanks again Donna x
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