The Christmas Party Part 3

Jokecliff batted away ‘eve_rey.thing.everyone.else.likes.i.dont.just.to.be.different’ from his crotch area…

” get off me woman ” he grumbled ”and help me to the toilet, fruitpunch goes right through me.”

Alkiarse was still clinging to Blondes ankle, like an ‘Asbo Tag’, and RosePedalbin who was trying to get all the girlies dancing had had quite enough.

She promptly whipped off one of her scholls and started battering alki round the head.

” let go of her you silly old sod, theres more chance of Jokecliff growing new teeth than you having a fumble in Blondes Sloggi’s !!”
Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted The Merrymoron slying about to shove a whole Black Forrest gateaux into the huge hole in his huge head.

She whizzed off her other scholl sandal and sent it flying across the room where it wedged itself in Merrys mouth,

” back away from the buffett Merry !!” she shouted, ” I say when its chow time in this joint !! Swallow my scholl and you’ll be sucking up liquidised,frozen pork chops, from lidl, through a straw !! ”

” Ugg…” said Merry

In his horsebox, Thick_Slice scratched his crotch and turned his attention to camera 1.

Jade_the_Blade and Eddie_The_Wimp were playing ‘ Hunt the Christmas Baubles ‘. Eddie popped his little head out of Jade’s humongous cleavage

” I think ive found them xxx lol ” he squeaked and popped back down.
Jade’s eyes went out on stalks as Eddie wriggled his way down to laa laa land.

Jokecliff came out from the toilet, his satin cat suit bore the tell tale signs of wee drips, but nobody told him.
He sauntered over to J and Helen from france, and turned on his best charm.

” Helen my Dear, may i say how delightful you look this evening, and J, what an outstanding Dickie, I do wish I had one ….”

Helen and J, polite, but not stupid, smiled and excused themselves to mingle, glancing nervously over their shoulders as they went.

Thick_Slice scratched his crotch again and looked at camera 2

Mariapizzaera had passed out and Claire_Dont_Dare_me had shaved Maria’s head and was drawing glasses and a beard on her face with her eyebrow pencil.

” ohhh its only a laugh…. she wont mind hahahaha hic…” she laughed, then stuck the pencil in her mouth and tried to light it with a tampon.

Very_Impotant_Peanut was fed up. He wanted a lady friend who wasnt an elderly schizophrenic with a beard, 37 personalities and looking for men over 40.

He eyed up Ugly_asa_Mooses huge hairy bottom as she and Nicey did an odd version of ‘The Twist’.

Mooses udders were swinging free, knocking ppls drinks over, and Niceys ‘Huge Jugs’ were wobbling like giant chivers jellies on a spin cycle.

” At least that would be comfy”, thought vippy, as he watched mooses tail swing,” and she’d keep you warm in the winter, I could always put a bag on her head”

He decided to make a move and tapped The Moose on the shoulder, but received a very stern glare off Nice_pies_Fem.

Feeling very brave, Vippy asked The Moose to dance. Ugly_asa_Moose fair swooned and batted her eyes, nodding.

Nice_Pies_Fem looked grumpy and stomped to the toilets, giving a grovelling alkiarse a swift kick on the way past.

Welchy_The_grape, 3 yards of loo roll still trailing from her knickers was bumping and grinding with Maxie_pad. They grabbed Penny_4_aguy, who was still watching the door, waiting for her secret admirers to make themselves known, and they made her join in on the dance floor.

” wow” whispered Welshy, ” check out Lonnie_The_Wigs new hair piece, he looks like pepe le fekkin pugh”

” Oh My God ” gasped Penny, ”’ Thats no wig, thats Charles !! ” And she rushed over and dragged the sleeping Charles off Lonnie_The_Wigs head.
Lonnie howled in agony as the startled Charles dug his claws in, leaving his shiney head looking like a barbers pole.

Thick_Slice scratched his crotch and checked out camera 3

Jokecliff had pinned Gill_Cambs in a corner and was salivating over her shoes, ” Yes… I know only too well what Thick_Slice is like my dear, you should have heeded my warnings about that womanizing low-life, I don’t normally befriend his cast off’s….”

He failed to mention that it was because none of them would touch him with anything but a tazar.

” I would, however, make an exception in your case ( as you have a pulse ) , would you like to come to hettie2, my new caravanette and we can sort out all your problems and I can show you my collections of nipple rings and bottom corks ?”

Gill_cambs pondered…. and tried to ignore Jokecliffs rancid breath…

Would she fall for it….?

Would she head out of the frying pan into the fire ?

would Vippy find happiness with a large furry animal ?

would anyone ever tell Welchy about the loo roll ?

would Blonde have her Sloggi’s interfered with ?

would Thick_Slice disccover how he caught crabs ?

would eve_ry.thing.you.like.i.dont.just.to.be.different ever pull anything other than a non functioning cracker ?

would Eddie_The_Wimp ever come up for air ?

would Mids_seeks_Rose ever have her scholls tucked under his bed ??????

would TinkleTits ever let neil_Gizafeel tamper with her tutu ?

would anyone realise Nicey had become locked in the loo and was howling like a water buffalo with a splinter ?

to be continued……….