THE BONFIRE PARTY End.

Jimmy_I’ll_Wop_you, slowly regained conciousness… he realised his head was laying in bellevues lap and she was gently dabbing his forehead with a stale hotdog and coo’ing…..

Jimmy screamed like a girl and shot to his feet… ” I’m ok , I’m ok..” he said quickly adjusting his loincloth…and he shot off into the bushes, like a pork pie being chased by Hattie Jaques.

Jokecliff was’nt a happy bunny. The truth was out, no more trying to impress the JC tarts with his farmhouse, he did try and regain some respect by dropping in a few mentions of his new motor, but unfortunately a Reliant Robin didnt have the ‘pulling power’ he’d hoped for.
Furiously, he pulled out a lipstick from his pocket and started scrawling Blondes and Clare_dont_dare_me’s phone number on the toilet walls.

What Jokecliff failed to notice was that everyone knew it was his doing and more to the point nobody actually cared anymore, gummy septuagenarians were hardly threatening, just sad.

HugeMember and Alkiarse were bonding in the bar… Huge kept Alki topped up with meths and listened to him pontificate about his pelmets…

” bartender… beer 35 and what the frick is a pelmet ? HAHAHAHAHAHA…. OI !! ”

Very_Impotant_Peanut spat his cabbage soup out as he spotted Mary_jane_ann_Tuna weaving her way thru the crowd towards him.

” Stevieeee… stevie talk to me … Am I still your girl ? ” she growled sounding like Rab C Nesbitt.

” look Mary_Jane I dont wantt tpo upsert youiu bt pleas leave mew alone, Ium spokem fort !!

” Pardon ?”

” Just sod orf wioll yu , go an chat tio Thlick_spice”

” Oh Ive had him, he dumped me when he realised my budgie was bigger than his, and mine was’nt plastic”

” your justt noit my tipe” said Peanut, glancing at Tuna’s wirey nostril hair..

Princess_Kenty and Thick_slice were becoming friendly by Bellevues HotDog stand..

” My My Kenty, those poppadoms look enticing.. i may need a nibble.”

Kenty giggled ” i feel like getting on the outside of a jumbo chapati”

Jimmy_I’ll_Wop_ya, misreading the situation and thinking kenty needed rescuing grabbed a toasting fork and charged at Thick_Slice.
Waving the fork threateningly at Thick he said …

” Worry not lovely lady, I am a master swordsman.. I once fought off 15 samurai warriors using only my toothbrush while i was researching the origins of The Tang Dynasty pottery for Nat Geo magazine….

”jeeze…” mumbled kenty ” I’ll never get my samosa stuffed at this rate !!! ”

RosePedalbin and Nice_Pies_fem having enjoyed a few ” slow screws against the wall” … were busting some moves by the bonfire….

” If you think I’m sexy… and you want my bodyyyy.. come on baby let me know…” they schreeched.. strutted and gyrated,

RosepedalBins droopy popsox sort of spoilt the effect though, and all the men just stared at Nice_pies_Fems huge jugs !!!

Uglyasa_Moose was snoring quite loudly, but this didnt put off Jimmy_I’ll_Wop_Ya from regailing her with tales from his past…

” One time when NASA was having a problem getting Apllo 13 down, they asked my advice, being an ex-astronaut I knew more than most..

……………….. so I punched the shark on the nose and swam with the 240lb unconcious guy the 16 miles back to shore and ……

……. so then we Bungee jumped off the Angel Falls for a laugh…………… But thankfully I was able to remove the bullet from the guys brain and left the others to closeup…………………..
……….and eventually the old silverback accepted me as the alphamale and the troop was cool again…

………… ……. of course crossing the Sahara with only one sandle and a piece of Juicy Fruit isnt everyones bag, but i enjoyed it…..

Eventually everyone at the bonfire party passed out / fell asleep / hung themselves [ delete as applicable]

RosepedalBin was clutching her scholls and dreaming of David Hasslehoff.

HugeMember and Alkiarse were spooning in the bar.

Thick and Kenty were missing !!!

JokeCliff had wandered back miserably to his Robin Reliant, he may as well head back to the bedsit and get his dentures in some sterident.

He started the engine and tootled off …….

BANG !!!!!!!!!!!!

Praise be to the Lord !! At last ….

Someone had shoved a masshive Banger up Jokecliffs spewing exhaust !!!

Jimmy smiled.