Taking responsibility …………

@drivel wrote:

@Bad Manners wrote:

Not everyone’s as perfect as you Drivel in having no vice’s. No one’s quite as arrogant as you either, and that’s a good thing for them.

Good reply BM

I have loads of vices , but I don’t blame them on anyone else – I’m probably the least arrogant man you could ever hope not to meet !!

Eventually the people you’ve mentioned will seek help. A lot of them will eventually quit drugs, alchohol or whatever it is they do. In managing to quit their vice they have my full respect.

Ok.
I would argue however that in a few of the cases you’ve mentioned impressionable teenagers are taken in by what they see on telly. Victoria Beckham walking around like a pencil could easily make teenage girls want to have that look, and that could lead them to anorexia. Teenager’s could easily start drinking or taking drugs because their fellows are taking it.
I dunno if impressionable teenagers can have blame on themselves for that. There’s maybe no blame for anyone. Sh.it happens.

Drivel i read your post with some interest, its quite thought provoking really……

i beleive that some addictions are caused by outside influences, a person who is abused or ‘downtrodden’ for instance can find solace in food or other substances, or turn to things like alcohol or gambling, these can be a distraction from the real world they hate so much…so technically not their fault?

i feel that the next statement from you will be so why let themselves be bullied, coersed into addictive, diverse behaviour? well maybe they have a trait that makes them want to be ‘accepted’ by what ever means? the child in the school playground who is the ‘odd one out’ for instance, the kids who are in ‘the gang’ approaching that child and saying for instance, you can be part of ‘our gang’ if you etc etc….

Food can be a great comforter drivel, eating your way out of trouble, comforting the same way as a baby feels when it is fed. what do babies do when they are hungry? they cry until someone feeds them…….

alcohol can be a great comfortor for ‘dulling’ the senses……if someone is in a real ‘hell hole’ of a life they can suddenly find that alcohol having ‘numbed’ the pain is a way out cos they cant find any other way out…..then if they drink enough they become reliant on it , it becomes a support…….and so on…….

so drivel all in all i dont agree with your statement its always the persons fault, you can of course take the stance that they should help themselves……… but some people just dont have the where withall to do that and neither do they have the direction or role models or indeed the circle of people to show them the way…….every child needs direction and role models for instance, you only have to look at romanian orphans with endless children rocking back and forth for comfort……….

ok another instance, how many homeless people are ‘succesful’ people who have had their lives turned upside down and lost everything for one reason or another???

ok off me soap box lol

hugssssssssssssss xxxx

Drivel, i dont know what to say , an absolutely horrific outcome i agree. Do you know i would blame him for driving…….now the thing is there are levels of blame, i have known people to drive in a fit of rage, now temper and anger can be controlled in my mind, although there is such a thing as ‘blind rage’ i suppose…..

in some ways i agree you cant go blaming everyone or everything else for your mishaps or circumstances….

i get angry when people who abuse children for intance say it woz cos they were abused, or adults who beat their kids an say ‘well it never did me any harm’ grrrrrrrrrrrr

you can help yourself to a certain degree, but for everyone person who has the strength to ‘break the mold’ there are 6 others that cant pull themselves out of trouble…….

perhaps if we were more helpful and nosey to a certain degree we could help some……for instance, who woz around wen that guy left the pub, who know he had his car keys etc etc………no im not trying to shift blame….it is unforgiveable his act of driving whilst under the influence…….and the most appalling tragedy as a result of his actions…. just trying to say perhaps we should be more charitable and be there a little more ifor people nstead of being so critical and living in our own blinkered worlds…..

and before anyone accuses me of being a ‘a do gooder’ thats not where im comin from…..in fact someone once accused me of being ‘ a tart wiv a heart’ pmsl…….if only i had ever graduated to tart my much longed for street cred would have finally arrived ………..but thats another story pmsl

hugsssssssssss xxxx