silly quotes

“I call everyone ‘Darling’ because I can’t remember their names.”
Zsa Zsa Gabor

“If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?”
Linda Ellerbee

“In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman.”
Margaret Thatcher

“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”
Katharine Hepburn

“When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men invade another country.”
Elaine Boosler

“I never married because there was no need. I have three pets at home which answer the same purpose as a husband. I have a dog which growls every morning, a parrot which swears all afternoon and a cat that comes home late at night.”
Marie Corelli

“I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch.”
Gilda Radner

“Any girl can be glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.”
Hedy Lamarr

“Behind every successful man is a surprised woman.”
Marion Pearson

“I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.”
Zsa Zsa Gabor

“Don’t knock masturbation, it’s sex with someone I love.”
Woody Allen

“The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money costs less.”
Brendan Francis.

“There we were in the middle of a sexual revolution wearing clothes that guaranteed we wouldn’t get laid.”
Denis Leary

“My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.”
Emo Philips

“It’s better to be black than gay because when you’re black you don’t have to tell your mother.”
Charles Pierce.

“A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said ‘no’.”
Woody Allen

“We had gay burglars the other night. They broke in and rearranged the furniture.”
Robin Williams.

“Life is a sexually transmitted disease and the mortality rate is one hundred percent.”
RD Laing.

“Love is the answer – but while you’re waiting for the answer sex raises some pretty good questions.”
Woody Allen

“An intellectual is someone who has found something more interesting than sex.”
Edgar Wallace