Petition for Martin43

@martin43 wrote:

I was disappointed with the disruption to my giants, er introduction thread. But of course, I forgive the person involved. But I am also sad people leave chat rooms without saying why or even goodbye; much worse than this, a dear friend who I met on another site, won’t answer my emails. I would guess when people say they want to get close, it is only until something else comes in up in real life. I am different and so I decided to stay. Back in the chat room next week, I hope. Talk to you some time Welsh. :)

There’s a subtext in this discussion that I find more interesting than the personal issue of your choice to post here or not, Martin. And that’s more to do with how we choose to comport ourselves on here.

Rather coincidentally, I mentioned Marshall McLuhan on this thread and he’s the man responsible for an often quoted saying: the medium is the message. Which kind of means how and where you say something is just as telling as what you say. So, chat rooms have their own fluid rules of behaviour and how people interact here is influenced by the medium chosen.

Chat rooms are extremely conducive to very fickle relationships. That’s not to say people don’t find genuine, true friends but, in no small part because of the anonymity of things, that’s not necessarily the norm. When people don’t say goodbye in a forum like this, or don’t leave complicated explanations of their actions, it’s not akin bumping into someone on the street and neglecting to apologize. It’s just the nature of the beast.

someone appearing to want to get close but pulls back when real life becomes more engrossing seems completely acceptable to me. Its’ the converse of such actions that I might be tempted to question: wanting to get close in the real world until virtuality supersedes would seem worrying.

I will gladly forgive someone not taking the time to say goodbye to me in here than their taking the time to tell me, in no uncertain terms, everything that is wrong with my gender, sexuality, political persuasions, religion – without even knowing me.

@tinks wrote:

@trapper wrote:

Bring back Geoff that’s what I say 8)

and a few others :D

Not Dagger though too risky :lol:

@tinks wrote:

@trapper wrote:

@tinks wrote:

@trapper wrote:

Bring back Geoff that’s what I say 8)

and a few others :D

Not Dagger though too risky :lol:

or pete

The good old days are always best because they are lost in time. I have been here for nigh on two years now and the names mean nothing to me so why have they stopped posting or moved on? Things evolve – chat and forums included. People come and go, some leave a mark others don’t, some remembered and others best forgotten

@martin43 wrote:

What can I say? I was very cosy with a French American lady for a year and a half. And she wanted us to move even closer; so we started to spend two to four hours a day communicating. And I had a vision or a long-term plan for the future. But one day she just dropped me. No disagreements. Just too busy. And now, she hasn’t got time for me as a friend. An amazing person and I am always going to miss her. But at the same time, I do feel very let down.

I’m sorry to hear that, Martin. Like J said some things just fizzle out. It has no reflection on you and the same could probably said for the French American lady, it’s just the nature of chat rooms.

We all become that little bit more inured the more these things happen and dare I say that’s not a good thing, because it makes it more difficult to get close to the next deserving person. Try to not take things too seriously in here, old bean or take things too harshly when people are not what you would hope they are. (Advice I should take heed of myself).

@tinks wrote:

@trapper wrote:

@tinks wrote:

@trapper wrote:

Bring back Geoff that’s what I say 8)

and a few others :D

Not Dagger though too risky :lol:

or pete

Pete ??? :shock: nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo