Parents in there old age, social care

doa …..i dont know how to react to your latest post….perhaps the right way is to not react at all…….

This forum i beleive is to interact with people….however you insist on making waves and causing unpleasantness……..hmmmmm what are you really feelin doa……attack is now, and will always be, the best form of defence.

Tommy i kind have put you to one side before……..can i ask if this is a normal freindly banter or is some of the surface animosity real……do you 2 actually know each other ??

forgive my asking its just i dot understand the relationship (if any) between you 2……..
absolutely nothing i can do about it but just trying to understand so i keep any uneccesary comments to myself…….

doa this is a difficult situation you are in but you didnt answer whether or not you have discussed with your mum why she left and she wasnt there for you……..i believe that if you havent already done this then this has to be the way forward…it still doesnt mean you have to pay anything towards your mums keep i do think that is totally unfair…..what concerns me more is your apparent anger and bitterness……….not good to carry round

now you quite justifiably can come back and tell me its your business but you did post this….and it is now in the public forum……dont take your anger and frustration or bitterness out on other people its not their fault you are in this postition

you will be relieved to know that i am finishing now…..just to say although for variious reasons i didnt always have my mum………i still would like just 5 more minutes with her to give her a hug ……..whatever she didnt do through no fault of her own she was and still is my mum xxxx

still sendin hugssss perhaps if you had had a few more doa…i wouldnt be writing this…..

Tommy? hugsss to you too hun ……i wish you well

xxxxx

@tommy-toxen wrote:

one day off is ‘too much’ time due to being ill??

you complete sad act.

“honour thy mother and thy father” – it’s your duty to look after them, you selfish arrogant prat.. that’s if you’re even telling the truth!

With all due respect Tom, and I don’t know what history there is with you and DOA, don’t really want to know either.

You can quote ”Honour they Father and thy Mother” but didn’t she owe her children a ‘duty of care’ too, something she obviously didn’t follow through on. Maybe she had her reasons for walking when he was only a child, some people can get past that and some can’t. Without knowing the full history of it, it’s really for none of us to condemn him for his own feelings about it all.

If it helps tho, a few years ago, it seemed as tho my father in law, (who has since passed on) would have to go into a home. He owned his own house, the authorities told him he would have to sell it to pay for his care in a home. He transferred the estate to his eldest daughter, which meant, that if he’d gone into a home, he wouldn’t have had to pay.

@tommy-toxen wrote:

you don’t know her circumstances, cas, i try not to judge.

DOA is obviously a very deranged and sick individual, I think I’d run away if I was his mother too.

he has admitted before he models himself after ‘the first chat room killer’, so lord knows what he was like with his mum.

anyway I think it’s safe to say where DOA is concerned, I’m sure she has a perfectly good reason for abandoning him.

The least he could do for being a complete to her is make it up to her in her dying years.

I don’t know her circumstances either Tom, which was why I said that none of us really, are in a position to judge.

Maybe she did have a good reason to leave, maybe she saw it, as some women do, her only way out of a bad situation. You can’t really lay the blame at the feet of DOA, whatever he might be or have said, he was still 7 years old at the time.

Why should he, if he chooses not to, make up anything to his mother, surely the onus is on her to do any making up and explaining, not him, having been only a small child. I would imagine confusion being one emotion playing a part. If your mother abandoned you, wouldn’t you want to know why? I probably would.

@tommy-toxen wrote:

you don’t know her circumstances, cas, i try not to judge.

DOA is obviously a very deranged and sick individual, I think I’d run away if I was his mother too.

he has admitted before he models himself after ‘the first chat room killer’, so lord knows what he was like with his mum.

anyway I think it’s safe to say where DOA is concerned, I’m sure she has a perfectly good reason for abandoning him.

The least he could do for being a complete to her is make it up to her in her dying years.

I don’t know her circumstances either Tom, which was why I said that none of us really, are in a position to judge.

Maybe she did have a good reason to leave, maybe she saw it, as some women do, her only way out of a bad situation. You can’t really lay the blame at the feet of DOA, whatever he might be or have said, he was still 7 years old at the time.

Why should he, if he chooses not to, make up anything to his mother, surely the onus is on her to do any making up and explaining, not him, having been only a small child. I would imagine confusion being one emotion playing a part. If your mother abandoned you, wouldn’t you want to know why? I probably would.

You made your points well Cas – well your 1 point – 3 times well

Well done lassy :lol: :lol: :lol: