-
Posts
-
The First Affair
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their
passions overcame them and they took off for her house, where they madepassionate love all afternoon.
Exhausted from the wild sex, they fell asleep, awakening around 8:00
PM. As
the man threw on his clothes, he told the woman to take his shoes
outside
and rub them through the grass and dirt. Mystified, she nonetheless
complied. He slipped into his shoes and drove home.“Where have you been?” demanded his wife when he entered the house.
“Darling, I can’t lie to you. I’ve been having an affair with my
secretary
and we’ve been having sex all afternoon. I fell asleep and didn’t wake
up
until eight o’clock.”The wife glanced down at his shoes and said, “You lying bastard! You’ve
been playing golf!”
Subject: Job Interview
The CIA had an opening for an assassin. After all of the background checks, interviews and testing there were three finalists, two men and one woman.
For the final test, a CIA agent took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun. “We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. Kill her.” The man exclaimed, “You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife!” The agent responded, “Then you are not the right man for this job. Take your wife and go home.”
The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room. All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the man came out with tears in his eyes and said, “I tried, but I can’t kill my wife.” The agent said, “You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home.”
Finally it was the woman’s turn. She was instructed to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room. Shots were heard, one after another, and screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. Then, all was quiet.
The door opened slowly. There stood the woman. As she wiped sweat from her brow she said, “The gun was loaded with blanks. I had to beat him to death with the chair.”
Moral: Women are evil. Don’t mess with them.
Get involved in this discussion! Log in or register now to have your say!