in the scheme of things…….

I wonder how a man may feel if he was investigated and was innocent? Would it damage the relationship though? Or does he not have to know? Am outta da loop lately?

/tuts.. this is NOT a common and Garden CRB… its to let Young parents know if the new person In their childrens life have previous for abusing children from a nip to sexual abuse.

I am perfectly aware of ” all that glitters etc”.. Please do not look for politics where they are not there.. I would rather SAVE a child. and i can say , hand on heart that if i thought any bairn out there was being abused, i would be the first to interfere. What is the alternative..? Do not let young mothers know that the”ideal man” they met is gonna win prizes from a Daddies sauce bottle ?

its not a simple case of grassing..its to keep children safe. YES there are Hundreds upon hundreds of good. loving stepfathers out there.. but while the jealous control freaks lurk, we have to be on our guards> there is far more to abuse, than a bruise.

@mrs_teapot wrote:

@melody wrote:

Alas being able to check up on someone proves nothing other than they have never been caught!

It amazes me how much strength is given to CRB checks and the like. People who are abusive (in whatever form) can be doing it for decades before they are even caught.

We only ever hear about the extreme cases or where catastophic failings in the system have resulted in a child’s death, but did you know it is so much more common than you think.

I used to own a nursery school and in one term alone we had at least 3 children whom we considered to be at risk and were monitoring. I actually had to take the step of referring one case to social services, doing so with such apprehension in case I was wrong – turned out that the child and family were already known to social services. I felt so much better on hearing that.

Child protection or safeguarding begins at home with you and me, never be affraid to take something further if you have a hunch, if you are wrong no harm done.

Abuse takes many forms, neglecting to take your ill child to a doctor cause you can’t take time of work is neglect which is abuse. Obviously sexual abuse is what it is but allowing a child to encounter sexualised viewing on tv for example a 13 year old watching an 18 certificate film, could be construde as abuse. Obviously extreme examples but like I said, good upbringing in a safe environment begins in the home.
I could talk about this all day as I have attended several courses on the subject over the years and seen some pretty harrowing stuff. Nothing shocks me. As long as people cannot even be civil to one and other in a chat room, what chance have the extremists in this society ever got of seeing right from wrong.

Anyway back to my original point, step fathers or not, CRB or not, Background checks or not, it will make no difference. it goes on. I know many men who adore and take on a child as if they were there own, why should they be scrutinised because of the actions of a minority in society?

Thanks for this Melody… one thing struck me though, do social services not inform the nursery if a child who is at risk is in their care? Surely the nursery should know?

Teapot

A child would have to be on the ‘At risk’ register and they are only put on this after much liaison between different agencies. A child can be known to social services for a variety of reasons but not be on the at risk register. Incidently the child that I referred to social services was actually under threat from an abusive relationship between his mother and her boyfriend. He actually came into nursery one day with 3 broken teeth from apparently falling in the bath. Maybe this fits in with this thread!

Thanks for the link Ruby I shall get reading!