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… To be full of Yuletide Spirit by lunchtime at the latest. Then I’m going to start on the narcotics. I feel like the twisted off-spring of Tony Harrison and DangerMouse.
sounds like a plan.
Reminds me of the time I kidnapped Major Clanger, tied him to a chair, and gave him my rendition of Classic Arthur Scargill Speeches for twelve days. This year I’m sensitive to the needs of my woman, who’s menstruating, and have got her the ideal present . . . . . . . . . . under the tree is a man with scissors lodged in his temple and barbed wire stuck up his rectum.
She can set fire to him later.
Don’t knock menstruation, the other side of it is babies.
u-huh.
Trouble is that if we ban PMS jokes then poor Jo Brand will have lost half her material. And aren’t men also victims of Satan’s Unholy Rage ? Please consider the men too, lapis, besides Russell’s mum….
My sister brought her baby over and asked if I wanted to wind him. I thought that was a bit drastic so I just gave him a dead leg.
Bugger. I’ve run out of drugs. Still, the walk to get some more will do me good. Especially if I take some booze with me for the journey. I’ll call it my detox day.
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