Help needed…. plz..

(To the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody)

Is this the real ‘hing, is this just methodone?

Stuck here in Maryhill, two bob fur the telephone?

Open yer wine an’ talk wi’ a whine like me.

Um just a chib man, gie me yir money.

Chib yer pal, rip yer Da; slash yer dug, ride yer ma!

Any way the Clyde flows Disnae really mater tae me……tae me.

Haw Maw, just chibbed some bam,

Buckie bottle tae the heid,

Noo the fookin’ b*****d’s deid!

Haw Maw, Um just oan parole,

But noo I’m headin back tae the Bar-L.

Haw Maw, ooh oohooh ooh,

Never meant tae steal yer purse,

But if I’m no fu’ o’ smack this time the morra’.

Carry oot, carry oot!

An then oot oan the batter!

Too late, the bailiff’s here,

Sends shivers doon ma spine,

Gubbed 10 jellies just in time.

Goodbye aw ma muckers, I’ve got tae go,

Got tae go and stab some swine fae up the scheme.

Haw Maw, ooh oohooh ooh

I’m a jakey bam, sometimes I ‘hink I’ve never been washed at all.

Never washed at all.

Never washed at all.

I see a little silhouetto of a bam,

Kick his a***. Kick his a***. Go and get us a swally

Thunderbolt, White Lightning, very very frightening to me!

Twenty Regal, Twenty Regal, Twenty Regal and some blaw,

Magnifi-fooking-co oh oh oh oh!

I’m just a fat boy, no c**t loves me,

I’m not a poofter everybody loves me,

Spare him a pound fur a wee cup of tea?

Get tae ****, skanky slob, will ye get a job?

Forfooksake, No! I will no’ get a job! – Get a job!

Forfooksake, No! I will no’ get a job! – Get a job!

Forfooksake, No! I will not get a job! – Get a job!

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no…..

Oh gonorrhoea! gonorrhoea! gonorrhoea and the clap!

Then doon the pub, has the barman set aside for me?

For me, for meeeee!?

So you ‘hink you can chib me and pish in my eye?

So ye ‘hink you can stab me an’ leave me to die?

Naw bawbag, can’t do that tae me bawbag!

Wait tae ah get oot, wait tae ah get right oot ma nut!

**** all really matters,

Any c**t can see,

**** all really matters,

**** all really matters tae me!

Any way the Clyde flows…..

_________________

Oss…. im havin a whale o a time… lol… my mind wanderin over different spectrums lol

here Oss my bro still has his ZX 48 Spectrum… in its case the works… must b worth a fair bit now.. eh… and he’s also got all his ohhh god the spellin skeletric’s lol…

ur still a kid aint ya lol..