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  • #10258

    WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN
    (AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)

    To those of us who have children in our lives,

    whether they are our own,
    grandchildren,
    nieces,
    nephews,
    or students…
    here is something to make you chuckle.

    Whenever your children are out of control,
    you can take comfort from the thought that
    even God’s omnipotence did not extend
    to His own children.

    After creating heaven and earth,
    God created Adam and Eve.

    And the first thing he said was

    ‘DON’T!’

    ‘Don’t what?’

    Adam replied.

    ‘Don’t eat the forbidden fruit.’

    God said.

    ‘Forbidden fruit?

    We have forbidden fruit?

    Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit!

    ‘ No Way!’

    ‘Yes way!’

    ‘Do NOT eat the fruit!’

    said God.

    ‘Why?’

    ‘Because I am your Father and I said so!’

    God replied,
    wondering why He hadn’t stopped
    creation after making the elephants.

    A few minutes later,
    God saw His children having an apple break
    and He was ticked!

    ‘Didn’t I tell you not to eat the fruit?

    God asked.

    ‘Uh huh,’

    Adam replied.

    ‘Then why did you?’

    said the Father.

    ‘I don’t know,’
    said Eve.

    ‘She started it!’

    Adam said.

    ‘Did not!’

    ‘Did too!’

    ‘DID NOT!’

    Having had it with the two of them,

    God’s punishment was that Adam and Eve
    should have children of their own.

    Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.

    BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

    If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven’t taken it,
    don’t be hard on yourself.

    If God had trouble raising children,
    what makes you think it would be
    a piece of cake for you?

    so here is a question

    if god was adam and eves dad
    and his punishment was to make them parents does that mean god started incest ?

    #337184

    I dunno what ya meant, but as im athiest and god dont exist, technically it dont count/!

    #337185

    I dont have a belief in god either, but it was funny anyway. :lol:

    #337186

    Once upon a time I read a book with some amazing fairytales and in it was a story about a couple who were happy doing what happy couples do.
    They enjoyed life (whatever that is), enjoyed gardening and love making till one day something awful happened.
    The wife was walking through the meadows of their huge estate and came past a tree bearing fruits unknown to her.
    The fruits were of spherical shape and and multi coloured, ranging from green to a bright and shiny red.
    She, being female and rather nosey, couldn’t resist touching one of those spheres when she suddenly heard a high pitched voice screaming: “DON’T”
    Moments later she heard another, more pleasant, deep and masculine voice telling her to pick and eat one. The woman ( a dumb blonde? ) couldn’t resist temptation and followed the advice of the second voice, picked one and ate it.
    Along came their landlord, questioned the woman about the theft of the sphere, frogmarched her back to her lord and master and evicted both of them.
    They’ve been living on some run down shack ( council estate? ), breeding like rabbits and collecting ASBOS ever since.
    So guys, if you want to make it in life (whatever that is) tie your dame to the bedpost and don’t let her wander about or you’ll be in the shyte

    #337187

    Wonder what Adam and Eves kids looked like ? maybe a bit like this ….. LOL :wink: :lol:

    #337188

    MIB
    that was funny

    #337189

    wasnt it issac that was born to adam and eve

    #337190

    well i think we came from the sea , that makes more sense seing as our young develop in water ,

    #337191

    @blackkettle wrote:

    wasnt it issac that was born to adam and eve

    Cain and Abel my dear they where begat not born lol

    #337192

    but I thought we came fae Monkeys…. who’s rite..??

    but i laff’d at that..

Viewing 10 posts - 1 through 10 (of 12 total)

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