Boards Index › General discussion › Off topic chat › For Anita – We want to help
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6 January, 2008 at 6:02 pm #8911
Mental Health Hotline
Operator – “Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.”
If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.
If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic depressive, it doesn’t matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with a button until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother’s and grandmother’s maiden names.
If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 999.
If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short term memory loss, please try you call again in a few minutes.
If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.
Anita, I think you need option 3 :P Good luck
6 January, 2008 at 6:03 pm #301515@~Pebbles~ wrote:
Mental Health Hotline
Operator – “Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.”
If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.
If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic depressive, it doesn’t matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with a button until a representative comes on the line.
If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother’s and grandmother’s maiden names.
If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 999.
If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short term memory loss, please try you call again in a few minutes.
If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.
Anita, I think you need option 3 :P Good luck
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
6 January, 2008 at 10:05 pm #301516hoy !!! im a bi-polar (manic depressive) …..I always knew that i had a nothingness..
but then…
6 January, 2008 at 10:06 pm #301517Pebbles..i dont really like you at all ! now go and FVCK yerself !
6 January, 2008 at 10:22 pm #301518Having a down moment are you rubes?
6 January, 2008 at 10:25 pm #301519@rubyred wrote:
Pebbles..i dont really like you at all ! now go and FVCK yerself !
take your head from out of your own ar sehole and breathe…all will be good again gran :wink:
6 January, 2008 at 10:34 pm #301520aye,,and we breathe…
its ok as i know Sian and Lucky…in fact no one really likes YOU !
yer an eejit !
6 January, 2008 at 10:36 pm #301521i like her little cat in her piccy… sh aggin the carpet
6 January, 2008 at 10:39 pm #301522@rubyred wrote:
aye,,and we breathe…
its ok as i know Sian and Lucky…in fact no one really likes YOU !
yer an eejit !
forgive me if i dont go away and bawl into my pillow wont you :lol:
Like the opinion of an old alcoholic means much to anyone anyway ……….. :roll:
have another swig and be happy
6 January, 2008 at 10:40 pm #301523 -
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