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@trapper wrote:
@martin43 wrote:
When I first started chatting in 2012 I thought it was absolutely fantastic. I could use my silly sense of humour and hopefully, my warm humanity to inspire people, to pull them up and to make them laugh. And as a two-way process, it could make me smile, forgot my troubles, give myself a lift. And sometimes it works, it really does.
But I thought I had made friends for life online, and in one case, I thought I had found everlasting love. Actually I have; but this time it is a one-way situation. Every friend I have ever made online has simply disappeared from my life. Some are busy with work; others decide to spend most of the time in the real world; some people you feel really close to disappear without saying goodbye; and other just simply start ignoring you.
I know I try too hard and most people just want to relax and be entertained. But since returning to the chat room or forum, and I have logged on three times, I have mainly been talking to myself. Trying to make jokes and be silly, but just feeling a complete fool and an absolute failure. And it makes me feel very sad and I don’t want to feel this way. Life is hard and depressing as it is.
I realise that this is going to sound so self-centred and full of self-pity. And I am sorry about it. But I do find it much easier to write in the first person and from my own experiences in life. I guess I need to pick and choose my moments on here much more carefully. If I need to relax, then maybe reading a book or watching television might be a better option. If there was anything worth watching that is.
Oh, I still intend to come on here and visit the chat room. Because there are several people that have impressed me and more importantly, I want to know that they are doing okay and that they are still around. I feel very fond of the people on justchat, and in a short space of time and I hope to be talking to them for a long time to come.
Warm wishes
martin43/typhoo
Lots and lots of people are pretending to be something they aint because it’s not face to face and they aren’t likely to be found out till they start believing the bullshit they’re typing. Me I’m as hard as nails and never ever get hurt… see it’s easy :wink:
That might be apathy you are referring to and not ‘hard nails’
‘Hurt’ is a very real emotion that humans must go through to evolve as individuals. It’s inevitable in life in order to reach some level of contentment.
Trolls will troll and people will fake their identity because it’s the internet and they can do it.
With more and more social media being broadcasted and more internet privacy being pushed, we are more likely to see less of the female pretending to be male, the ugly ducking posting model pictures.One thing I learned is never to reveal too much unless you plan to make these online friends, real life friends…. and never to emotionally invest in someone online, unless you have solidified a plan to meet them.
Not sure how I managed to rant so much off topic!!!
As for depression, it’s an awful state for everyone, including the depressive’s loved ones. It’s an on and off cycle for everyone. Releasing endorphins, Vitamin D, a reasonable diet, exercise and lots of love seems to help.
It can be a numbing experience for someone involved with a depressed person too, because they are pouring their all into someone who can’t give any of it back. A bottomless pit that tests ‘unconditional love’ … a bit like an addict.@trapper wrote:
“simple” depression ?
yes…
depression can come with a lot of other problems, and that involves a lot of other solutions…but one person I knew ended up in a high-security hospital to prevent self-harm..a victim of the NHS drugs brigade and ect unit (their answer to depression), but something could be done even there..not perfect, but people who refuse to be drawn into the depression and keep life moving around her as she came home.
degrees of depression too…
I’ve known two people so depressed that they killed themselves (no, not after talking to me :!: )
Neither of them talked about their depression. They just were. There was something about them – very very withdrawn. No self-pity, no calls for help, just really withdrawn (this is a very long time ago now)
My main point was to do something about it, and with depression that means finding someone who can help you find that spark which gets you fighting. You have rights – demand them.
@sceptical guy wrote:
My main point was to do something about it, and with depression that means finding someone who can help you find that spark which gets you fighting. You have rights – demand them.
I agree sceptical guy we do have rights and yes wen a person feels strong enough they should demand, however sometimes people aren’t mentally strong enough to stand up for their rights but maybe a family member or close friend could do this for them, I have experienced suicide of a family member, no cry for help, and it was a shock to the whole family but strangely made our family unit much tighter…….I would not wish depression on my worst enemy……….it can destroy lives and wreck family’s……it takes over normal day to day living and whilst the world carries on around you its like being trapped in a bubble that you can’t escape from, a deep dark hole circles your whole body and your mind can’t function and reason with reality……reaching out to anyone who might listen and take a minute to let you know that life is worth living, its a long dark lonely road but with the correct treatment and support people can slowly recover……my heart goes out to anyone who is in that dark place at the moment……..dont give up keep fighting xxx
Hang on…hasn’t this Martin guy made this overly dramatic exit speech before on another thread? If you don’t feel like coming here anymore just don’t log in mate, seems like you are either trolling or looking for attention. All good points about depression by the way, for me personally i find it’s always handy to have someone around that constantly makes you think about positive things that will occur in the future, even if it’s just a plan to go watch a film at the cinema or going for a pint. If you are that depressed that you can’t get out of bed…don’t put any pressure on yourself to do so.. Don’t put pressure on yourself at all infact. It’s the stress of fighting against your depression that makes it worse i find … Just allow it to happen and it will eventually pass….everything does. I would also suggest cognitive behavioural therapy to try to make you think differently about the things that are causing you to feel low. medication is fine but it’s only really masking the problem, i think in everyones life, something either traumatic or confusing will happen that knocks your confidence a bit and from then on you will have kindof 2 versions of yourself.. before ”the thing” happened and after the thing happened. And these worrying, stressful thoughts go from being just worrying, stressful thoughts to a a kindof feeling in itself, a dull hypnotic lazy state, aka depression. I just think if you can deal with the root cause, look within and truly examine yourself. you are half way down the road to recovery. For some people it might just be a case of a chemical imbalance in the brain causing you to feel unhappy (possibly genetic) though, and in those cases takin the meds can’t hurt can it… Anyway keep smiling :) peace xx
I am very sad to read that you think I might be trolling. If so, would I have posted my picture on another thread? If anyone thinks that, I could give you evidence to the contrary: my professional qualification certificate, my community award, my Green party candidacy information and some very positive references.
But I don’t blame you for saying so and it is my fault. As usual, I blunder into things and make life very difficult for myself. In my defence, I do think as human beings we should be better. We need to be more caring and have much more of a community. Perhaps being a bit more understanding of people and giving them a chance rather than thinking the worst? But you’re right, I do feel rather selfish and embarrassed for making some much fuss. I hope people can forgive me and I am sorry about it.
Warm regards and best wishes to everyone
Martin
Its the cheery threads that make it all worthwhile eh :shock:
How does posting your picture prove you’re not a troll lol?. It only proves you’re not a cowardly one..
Well, I am going to take back all my apologies. My ambition was to be warm, friendly,caring and try to get a bit of a community going on this board and in the chat room. And all I got was cynicism from somebody who clearly doesn’t share my views. And instead of giving me the apology that I deserved, he just kept making remarks, directly and indirectly, about people who can’t take a joke, who take themselves too seriously and do gooders. He thought I was in easy target, but I am not. I am fed up with self-proclaimed clever people, who are polite and charming, but in reality are selfish and just take, take, take. Why not apologise and show me the hand of friendship?
And why should I not talk about people’s behaviour in the chat room? We need other people in this life and in the future this will be even more important. With environmental pressures, resource depletion and a handful of very, rich people controlling resources, life could be about to get very hard for the majority of us. As a Green Party member and a qualified accountant, I know this more than most people.
We can make a difference, we really can. When I was about to go for my MRI scan, I had so many messages of support and encouragement. And the next day, when I was in a panic and I really wanted to come out of the machine, those words really came back and helped me. And I am so grateful to those people and I want to do the same for other people.
I don’t see anything wrong in saying that I might not come on here again or I may take a break. I am sure some people would like to know. I wish some people I have met in the past would have told me – I still look out for them, hoping they will came back. But more importantly, why shouldn’t I try to make people change? I don’t want people to disappear. I don’t want others to approach me in private and then run off because they don’t understand what I am saying. And I certainly don’t want people going quiet on me. I want to talk, be inspired or being inspiring. And have a little fun of course. Otherwise I would rather listen to some music or read poetry etc.
I don’t know you Mr Shidkins. I haven’t got a clue about your personality and character. But I do know one thing; I don’t appreciate a stranger coming on here and calling me a troll. I will put my credentials against your own ones any day. After your response to my last email, you owe me an apology. Are you big enough to give me? I very much doubt it.
There are some wonderful people in this room and I have had a couple of lovely private messages over the last few days. But my time and effort would be much better served elsewhere. I do intend to pop in to the chat room from time to time. And I will be soft,caring, warm and silly. But I am going to stand up for myself from now on.
Please take care people and thanks for all the warm and helpful messages.
Well Martin, much like you can’t appreciate me calling you a troll (even though i didn’t directly call you one i just said it ”seemed” like you were) I’m sure many people don’t apreciate you coming to a chatroom and right off the bat proclaiming how you would like to see things run in here, it’s really no wonder you have received such a backlash of negatiivity. If you are a newcomer trying to integrate yourself in the community it’s probably not the smartest move to be too loud and opinionated until people are comfortable enough in your presence. you’ve came in here like a tornado making demands and expecting to be shown respect when you haven’t really earned it yet. Can you not see how this behaviour might make people take a step back and think ”who the hell does this guy think he is?”
No i shall not give you an apology you arrogant, self serving, cantankerous little toad… good day!
What’s an advantage to Major Depression?
You never have to make your bed, since you’re always in it.
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