‘Celebrity’ faces you’d love to smack

The celebrity i’d love to smack is; Roland Rat. Don’t ask me why. I just do.

Timmy Mallet. WHAT the hell was he. Come to think of it, WHERE the hell is he? I’ll give him Mallets fookin mallet.

Anthea Turner. How clean is your house? YES ANTHEA, just how clean is YOUR house? Oops i wanna smack a woman..

Lets hope Jeremy Kyle aint watching. You name it, his brother has done it. He’s gambled, drunk, lied. Didn’t even know he was related to John Prescott.

Now,.. GEORGE BUSH. What an idiot. Starts a sentence and forgets what he’s talking about. “WE SHALL ALL UNITE CITIZENS, AND BE AS FOOKIN THICK AS ME.” He aint really a celeb though is he? Just some old man suffering from alchzeimers disease.

Ted Rogers. That thing he did with his fingers at the end of the show! Bet his wife misses him. :shock:

billy connolly???? jimmy carr??? jonathon ross???? do you have a sense of humour they are feckin quality how dareeeeeeee you

Rubbish, they are puerile rude egoists. Connolly made a sick joke about Ken Bigley that cleared a show when the audience walked out. He’s about as funny and as nice as the late Bernard Manning!

Did I put Jeremy Clarkson on the list? I should have done.

Also I’ll add more to my list:

Chris Woodhead, former schools inspector – Why do they still wheel him out to make comments?
Jenny Eclair – just plain annoying.
Simon Cowell
Gordon Ramsay

Billy Connolly is one of the funniest people on the planet, hes a legend!

Some people would say that about Des O’Connor! It means nothing. Billy Connolly was funny once, years ago. But now he’s stuck in a groove and is kept going by middle-aged admirers who think they’re cool because they like a man in black tights who walks about with a glass of water using the F-word a lot on stage. Seeing him doing his act is equivalent to watching replays of Monty Python’s dead parrot sketch over and over again (LOL – who said I haven’t got a sense of humour!! LOL LOL) (gulps from glass of water and turns slowly on heel to pace in opposite direction).

On the other hand, when Billy did those documentaries where he toured round on a trike he was good, he was more natural and I warmed to him. Perhaps he should be a TV presenter. It’s true he’s good at observing and communicating absurd situations, but he’s pushed the bounds beyond good taste a few times and that’s why I compare him to the late Bernard Manning or to Jim Davidson.

@bassingbourne55 wrote:

Billy Connolly is one of the funniest people on the planet, hes a legend!

Billy Connolly was funny once, years ago. But now he’s stuck in a groove and is kept going by middle-aged admirers who think they’re cool because they like a man in black tights who walks about with a glass of water using the F-word a lot on stage. Seeing him doing his act is equivalent to watching replays of Monty Python’s dead parrot sketch over and over again

how can i put this….B ollocks :P