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Posts
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do what most would do pick them all and hope that they dont tell each other lol
@thistle-fem-1964 wrote:
do what most would do pick them all and hope that they dont tell each other lol
Lol ThistLe,
I could pick them all because once a lassie has agreed to go on a date with me, for some peculiar reason she has always chosen to keep quite about it.
Dear Mr Trawler,
Please accept my apologies for not having replied to your last correspondence but I have been rather preoccupied. When we bumped into each other last night in the Grand Lobby of the Forum Three hotel I wasn’t sure if you recognised me but I did promise to write one last letter to tie up some loose ends so as promised, here it is.
You see, not long after your last missive I had a surprise visitor who brought to my attention the correspondence you were having with other ladies. Well I was devastated; with your smooth words and attention to my ample assets I truly thought that I was your one and only, that you would eschew all others. Just as I was drying my eyes with what I thought was a lace hanky but turned out to be a lacy thong – oh how embarrassing! – my unexpected visitor then showed me copies of the pictures that you alluded to in your last missive.
Well what can I say? I am very flattered at how you imagined me and your attention to anatomical detail was astounding, you have obviously spent many hours studying both the male and female form in some detail.
As impressed as I was with your imagination and attention to detail, I couldn’t believe that the human body could perform in such a way and said as much to my visitor who by now, having held and comforted me as I wept and listened attentively to my woes, was becoming a good friend. To my surprise he assured me that it was indeed possible and offered to show me how.
The past few days have been such a blur; not only can the human body perform in such a way but the experience, the sensations, the mutual pleasure…quite exhilarating and unlike anything I have ever experienced with any of my previous husbands. It’s also very addictive, I find that I just can’t get enough!
My dearest Mr Trawler, I have so much to thank you for, you have truly opened my eyes to the delights that the human body can offer and I am so grateful, but it is with regret that I must withdraw my application to be your cyber valentine. You see, whilst sharing these learnings I have fallen in love with my visitor who has made it all so real and I’m sure you’ll agree that any experience in the real world is far superior to the experience in the cyber world.
I am sure you won’t be too bereft at the news as it seems you have plenty of female company to choose from and I hope that you will find the same pleasure that I have.
Kindest regards,
JenP.S. Your manservant says that your lucky grey y-fronts are in the bottom drawer of the tallboy although he’s not sure why you call them lucky as they’ve never worked. Please don’t worry about the outstanding three weeks pay that you owe him – he suggests that you use it to buy the lucky lady you select as your valentine a box of Maltesers, it should stretch to that.
@jen_jen wrote:
Dear Mr Trawler,
Please accept my apologies for not having replied to your last correspondence but I have been rather preoccupied. When we bumped into each other last night in the Grand Lobby of the Forum Three hotel I wasn’t sure if you recognised me but I did promise to write one last letter to tie up some loose ends so as promised, here it is.
You see, not long after your last missive I had a surprise visitor who brought to my attention the correspondence you were having with other ladies. Well I was devastated; with your smooth words and attention to my ample assets I truly thought that I was your one and only, that you would eschew all others. Just as I was drying my eyes with what I thought was a lace hanky but turned out to be a lacy thong – oh how embarrassing! – my unexpected visitor then showed me copies of the pictures that you alluded to in your last missive.
Well what can I say? I am very flattered at how you imagined me and your attention to anatomical detail was astounding, you have obviously spent many hours studying both the male and female form in some detail.
As impressed as I was with your imagination and attention to detail, I couldn’t believe that the human body could perform in such a way and said as much to my visitor who by now, having held and comforted me as I wept and listened attentively to my woes, was becoming a good friend. To my surprise he assured me that it was indeed possible and offered to show me how.
The past few days have been such a blur; not only can the human body perform in such a way but the experience, the sensations, the mutual pleasure…quite exhilarating and unlike anything I have ever experienced with any of my previous husbands. It’s also very addictive, I find that I just can’t get enough!
My dearest Mr Trawler, I have so much to thank you for, you have truly opened my eyes to the delights that the human body can offer and I am so grateful, but it is with regret that I must withdraw my application to be your cyber valentine. You see, whilst sharing these learnings I have fallen in love with my visitor who has made it all so real and I’m sure you’ll agree that any experience in the real world is far superior to the experience in the cyber world.
I am sure you won’t be too bereft at the news as it seems you have plenty of female company to choose from and I hope that you will find the same pleasure that I have.
Kindest regards,
JenP.S. Your manservant says that your lucky grey y-fronts are in the bottom drawer of the tallboy although he’s not sure why you call them lucky as they’ve never worked. Please don’t worry about the outstanding three weeks pay that you owe him – he suggests that you use it to buy the lucky lady you select as your valentine a box of Maltesers, it should stretch to that.
Ha Ha jen… so funny :D I’m left wondering what other name this man servant chats under though…. any clues :?
Dear Mrs Jen Jen
Many thanks for your letter
I’m loath to accept that the providence of our unexpected encounter in the Grand Lobby of the Forum Three Hotel is to be short-lived. As your letter alludes to the purple prose of my correspondence with other ladies, you will understand it was inevitable that I would vaingloriously surmise the scarlet hue of your cheeks and the fervent undulation of your ample assets was due to my humble presence. I’m a humble man and unaccustomed to the attention of so many enchanting ladies. Suffice to say I was intoxicated with the belief that the industrious machinations of Eros were exclusively focused on me in order to ensnare a life partner or at the very least someone to share an unforgettable, intimate five minutes with (please don’t forget that I have reached a certain age and it is perhaps wise to adjust any expectations of my amorous capabilities accordingly). To borrow a modern parlance, perhaps more likely to be quoted by our mutual acquaintance Danny, ‘I thought I woz Da Man.’
Despite the protestation of my enemies and the green-eyed allegations of my comrades in the JC Gentlemen’s establishment, I remain a timid fellow with limited intimate knowledge of the female form. How could I have ever known that it takes more than an introductory kiss on the hand of a maiden to satiate the ardent passions within? Upon witnessing my manservant surreptitiously leave your room, how was I to know it was much more than honestly mistaking my hotel room for yours? Even though he had a rather sheepish look and was lacking the lower part of his uniform, his explanation that his paltry stipend was not sufficient to ensure he was always properly attired seemed plausible.
However with retrospect I can now identify why he has presently been unable to marshal the necessary energy to fulfil his duties to a satisfactory standard. It seems rather apropos to mention that if you’re interested in his professional capabilities then I’m unable to provide a positive reference: he is a terrible valet and I am constantly finding lacy thongs in my handkerchief drawer of my tallboy.
On occasions when I had been unable to entice my JC colleagues participate in the leisurely pursuits befitting a gentleman I had taken to playing a game of cards with my manservant for my own amusement. Whilst he was always contented to lose in order to maintain that the status quo between master and servant remained in tact, he took far too great an interest in my favourite card. I’m sure I don’t need to remind you of the likeness to your good self.
I’m fully aware that I can no longer count upon his willingness to undertake his duties with unbounded zeal these days, but I was confident I would always be able depend on his Dewey standard upkeep of my library. Almost in direct opposition to the exponential growth in his concupiscence has his pride in the meticulous archiving of my library dissipated. Should you perchance espy the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy, The Joy of Sex by Dr Alex Comfort and Wordsworth’s Guide To What Every Gentleman Should Know About What Happens In The Boudoir, ex libris, Rusty Trawler, please return them to my estate and no questions will be asked.
I’m delighted to discover my humble drawing of our imagined physical union and the apocryphal tales of which I was unable to refrain from relating to my JC brethren have enabled you to unleash your latent physical passion. After multiple readings of the more salacious details of your last letter I fear any attempts on my part to match your corporeal desires would only result in my untimely demise. Never have I more coveted the savage physique of my manservant or wished I had exercised more attention when he wielded the ‘tools’ of his trade.
I suspect the other ladies may elect to extract their interest too once they read this letter, but you can never miss that which you have never had as they say.
Kind regards,
Rusty Trawler
P.S: should you encounter my manservant in the near future, could you kindly enquire about the whereabouts of my special pills? Every time I mentioned your ample assets they seemed to instantly disappear and he would ask for time off in lieu.
Seems like everyone is withdrawing their application hmmmmm well i wont be …. now maybe just maybe i might be in with a chance of being mr trawlers valentine date im keeping my fingers crossed :) waits with baited breath :shock: :?
Dear Mr Trawler,
Your latest letter has left me quite confused. I was under the impression that your manservant had left your employment and now it seems he is still with you. So what of his ailing mother who he visits frequently, was that really you that he was going to see? And what is he doing with the financial gifts I have made him to enable him to buy his ailing mother the small luxuries to make her last days on this earth more pleasurable? Oh dear, I fear I have been taken for a fool! My mother always said that I was too quick and easy in my willingness to share my assets and pleasures with others and I fear that she may be right, it would seem that he has used the information provided in our correspondence to his advantage. I shall give him his marching orders I think…in due time of course…we only have one more of your drawings to attempt anyway so I might as well wait until after we’ve completed that.
But what to do with this passion that has been stirred within me? I could foreswear men, pursue the more sapphic pleasures that are offered on occasion but I don’t think that’s really for me. I don’t want to b driven to pursue a man just to satisfy my needs either; making the foolish application to be your cyber valentine, embarrassing myself so in the process and the final shame of being taken advantage of have shown me the error of my ways. I think that from now on I will play it cool, become an ice maiden, and any man who wishes to have the pleasure of my company will have to woo me and melt that ice before I grant him any favours. Yes I think that’s it, and in the meantime I’m sure my good friend Ann Summers will show me ways in which to quell my burning passion.
My deepest apologies for rambling but I must away, I have a friend to visit and some shopping to do.
Kind regards,
JenP.S. A minor note, you addressed me as Mrs, I am not currently married so my title is Ms. Oh and your special pills are here with me, your manservant left them the last time he was here, before his mother called for him to sit with her, allegedly. Aren’t they a pretty shade of blue?
Dear Trawler,
will i do ?
winks at jen
flippin eck you’ll give him a heart attack girl!!! :lol:
And where’ve you been?!
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