I have made my wishes known to my little sister n the event of my death bfore the kids are old enough to deal with it.
It’s such a difficult thing to deal with when a close relative dies & you have to make all the arrangements as well as cope with everything else.
My mum god love her knew she was terminal years ago & my dad refused to discuss arrangements ( he was in total denial of the whole situation). When it happened Me being the elsest had to deal with the arrangements & the “fear” of getting it wrong was a real headache.
Fair play to your mum for discussing it however difficult it is. I hope you don’t have to deal with it for a good while yet. x