A Day In The Life Of …………….

@savvy wrote:

I can assure you I have a very good grasp of the English language dear. Your reply was lame to say the least. Whereas you are used to many bowing to your superior knowledge and self appointed veneration, you may find there are those who though do not express it openly, do indeed see right through it!

No list I see…skirted round that one as usual……typical example of someone who thinks she knows it all….mouths off…but nothing to back it up with………still……….I bet you are glad you managed to say it all on the message boards for all to see Savvy…knowing the “frenzy” this thread is causing
Do carry on trying to put everyone down….one day you may have something positive to say

@irish_lucy wrote:

What is bulling???

Bulling means several things, but the common thread is something smelly and soft and plenteous.

In this instant, when someone who doesn’t usually post on the boards is hung out to dry, it means that when criticised an almighty blast of abuse is aimed at critics, burying the main issue. This is known in Canada as a snow job, and is a tactic often used in workplaces to get rid of someone you don’t like..

As rightly said by Irish Lucy (and Ms K and Jen), if Anita is a total a-hole in the chat room, the adult who is being upset can press that little ‘ignore’ button and hey presto the a-hole disappears. I have used this button often and it is the loveliest button in the chat room (is that the right way of putting it?). If you see some a-hole in the room, nothing wrong with dealing with him then and there – much fun to be had. The fun is increased, and you’ll feel good’, because the said a-hole has the right to replay, and usually does – pathetically, providing a sitting duck for your fun..

and that. dear readers, is what this thread is actually all about. I found the personalities revealed during the ‘frenzy’ to be interesting. *waves at Savvy :wink:

@omalleythealleycat wrote:

There’s an issue with the ignore feature – it doesn’t stop the other party saying (typing) whatever they want to about the target, in full view of other chatters. Rightly or wrongly, some will believe that allowing this to go unchallenged would be seen as weakness and instead feel compelled to fight their corner, to defend their honour, to meet fire with fire, to stand up and be counted. The very existence of these phrases speaks volumes about the human psyche and explains why many find taking the ignore route difficult, or even unacceptable.

Whilst I understand the view that ignoring an abusive chatter will starve them of the attention they crave, it’s only the attention of the target they’re starved of. They still have the attention of all those who haven’t chosen to ignore – and this can lead to the view that the perpetrator is untouchable in terms of what they’re able to get away with.

It could also be argued that those who habitually exhibit vile, nasty tendencies, effectively declare open season on themselves and forfeit any right for the opposition to play by the rules of fairness and decency – in which case, any method of dealing with them (including ‘hiding’ whilst attacking) could be considered perfectly acceptable.

I’ve heard that before, TC.

It is a problem. When I press ignore, I announce it, so that people are aware that I’m not going to answer. If I did feel that the a-hole was clever (is Anita in this category? Never struck me as such, but maybe I’m wrong), then I may add that only idiots would believe him/her. I might ask someone to let me know privately if something particularly scandalous was said.

But if you can’t touch that iggy button and feel the need to fight fire with fire (as you say, human nature *sigh), then you’re not really being bullied – you’ve let the a-hole push you into a fight, which is different. If you get humiliated in that fight, then that’s your fault for being provoked to fight with the same tactics. Be less stupid next time (a lesson I have been taught in jc).

I’m sure there are endless ways in which we can discuss ‘but what if…’?

It doesn’t sound that anita was anything but offensive, and not clever with it. That is the anita I’ve noticed, but maybe he’s a bigger problem??

@omalleythealleycat wrote:

@sceptical guy wrote:

…then you’re not really being bullied – you’ve let the a-hole push you into a fight, which is different.

But surely, being ‘pushed into a fight’ still counts as being bullied. After all, if there was no initial ‘pushing’, there would be no ‘fight’ right?

To be honest, I don’t think the majority of people actually think of themselves as being bullied in these situations. All they see is someone being obnoxious – and they then make a decision, which may be to ignore or to comment.

To my mind, none of the ‘blame’ shifts from the instigator to the target, whether the latter chooses to engage the former or goes the way of iggy.

I guess you’re right about being bullied into a fight..

It’s not as bad as some of the actual fights I’ve seen.

Learn for next time is my advice.