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HOW TO STUFF YOUR TURKEY AT CHRISTMAS:
1. Take one big Turkey (BTW who can spot which one is the turkey???)
2. Carefully check that the giblets have been removed. (This is the same technique used by Gynaecologists the world over)
3. Encourage your dog / cat to be sick into a convenient bowl. Mix this with equal proportions of Pedigree Chum, sweetcorn, and tomato skins. Season to taste with herbs, freshly milled black pepper, and a dash of Angostura Bitters. (If you don’t have this Worcestershire sauce will do).
4. CAREFULLY insert the stuffing mixture up the Turkey’s bum – taking great care that it doesn’t bite you in retaliation – after all how would you like this stuff forced into your bottom???
(BTW: The striped maggots are there for decoration but they can be served up to your mother-in-law if she gets out of hand !!!)
5. When fully stuffed your Turkey should look something like this:
(Photo of Ugo is only used as an example and does not mean that he looks like a turkey).
6. Decorate (in)appropriately with foil and roast in a hot oven.
7. Invite your dysfunctional family / relatives round to share in the joys of a Christmas meal together. Don’t forget to argue over which TV channel to watch the Queen’s speech on.
8. Children don’t always like Turkey – so have something nutricious and tasty for them to eat as well
9. If you have eaten a bit too much, don’t worry – you can always give the family a swift bath (barf !) and go back for some more.
………. and finally, I hope that you all enjoy your Christmas to the full, and on Christmas day – you all stuff yourselves !!!
Err…………….. all the more reason we are having lamb!!
Seasons greetings to you and yours! :wink:
PB and cub after our heavy Christmas lunch.
Ugo eating his Christmas lunch
….and specially for our American members >>>>>
….and finally – THIS will happen to your backside if you eat too much Christmas fare
@forumhostpb wrote:
HOW TO STUFF YOUR TURKEY AT CHRISTMAS:
<span style="color: darkblue]………. and finally, I hope that you all enjoy your Christmas to the full, and on Christmas day – you all stuff yourselves !!![/color”>
And stuff you aswell lol, merry xmas old fellow and festive greetings to all 8)
And with that, here’s a nice rendition of that good old classic, the 12 days of christmas…ALTOGETHER NOW!!!!!
On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
An Afghan refugeeeeeee.
On the second day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the third day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the fourth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.[/color]On the fifth day of Christmas,
my true love gave to me
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the sixth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Six naked pics of Peter Beardsley
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringggggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the seventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Seven DOA clones,
Six naked pics of Peter Beardsley
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringgggggggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the eighth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eight Lesbian lapdancers
Seven DOA clones,
Six naked pics of Peter Beardsley
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringgggggggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the ninth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
some rope so i could fckin hang meself, bah humbug!lol@the turkey in a bikini :lol:
ahhh its our emma
@anita Gofradump wrote:
@forumhostpb wrote:
HOW TO STUFF YOUR TURKEY AT CHRISTMAS:
<span style="color: darkblue]………. and finally, I hope that you all enjoy your Christmas to the full, and on Christmas day – you all stuff yourselves !!![/color”>
And stuff you aswell lol, merry xmas old fellow and festive greetings to all 8)
And with that, here’s a nice rendition of that good old classic, the 12 days of christmas…ALTOGETHER NOW!!!!!
On the first day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
An Afghan refugeeeeeee.
On the second day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the third day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the fourth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.[/color]On the fifth day of Christmas,
my true love gave to me
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the sixth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Six naked pics of Peter Beardsley
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringggggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the seventh day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Seven DOA clones,
Six naked pics of Peter Beardsley
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringgggggggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the eighth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
Eight Lesbian lapdancers
Seven DOA clones,
Six naked pics of Peter Beardsley
Five butt plugs that gave me a sore ringgggggggggg,
Four smelly turds,
Three JC huns,
Two Government discs that are missing,
And a Afghan refugeeeeeee.On the ninth day of Christmas,
my true love sent to me
some rope so i could fckin hang meself, bah humbug!:lol: :lol:
I’d dare say you’ve stuffed many a turkey over the years PB. :wink: :lol: :twisted:
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