NEARLY SLIM NURSES

I read in the newspaper at the library that there is a terrible crisis facing our lovely nurses. 75% of beautiful English student nurses will be without a job after qualifying this Summer. I suppose only the very slim ones and the best dancers will get jobs as nurses and all the horrible fat ones will have to go and work in shops or something instead of becoming matrons. This must mean that there must be HUNDREDS of nearly slim nurses who are stuck in the middle – not slim enough for Harley Street and not plump enough for Matalan. These are the ones who normally have to go and work for the NHS but their places have been taken up by horrible old Nigerians and Indians and the like. I reckon they would do almost anything for a job. It’s given me a WONDERFUL IDEA of making a play or a musical or something that requires hundreds of sexy nearly nude ladies and of course all these roles will be filled by nearly slim nurses desperate to find work. I haven’t thought of the storyline yet but it would probably involve a famous explorer who was exploring all these topless tribeswomen who he had found in a remote part of the world, probably somewhere abroad. I would probably be best to play the role of the famous explorer as it was all my idea. The show would tour all over England and it would put all the lovely nearly slim nurses in the limelight. After every show, I would imagine all the men who were sitting in the front rows (and had had a bit of an eyeful) would probably come backstage and ask to employ the nurses that had caught their eye during the show. All the ones who hadn’t managed to be sold off at one show would turn up for the next show and so on and so forth until we arrived at the end of the tour and anyone left unsold would have to go and work for the local council. I think it’s the least we could do to show our sexy nurses how highly they are regarded, don’t you?