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Well so many questions this raises in my head. A model professional footballer, looked up to with respect by seemingly everyone. Wales manager. Family man. By all accounts happy and making plans for the future. Only a couple of years older than myself at 42.
I really dread to think what was going on in this mans mind to cause him to end it. In fact it saddens me deeply, especially for his family and children.
Which brings me to my point. I dont think we will ever know why, but….
It highlights to me the importance of talking, of communicating, of sharing your feelings with others, maybe this wouldnt have happened if he had.
I spent 38 years as a bottler, I was never taught to communicate and it is only since my split with my wife that I have realised how important it is. Since then I have learnt to say how I feel, although it is not always the right thing to do or the right time, as a couple of people here will testify to. I now know though that I have friends that, if i need to in the future I will have no problems telling them if im in trouble. Such is the value of communication.So what im saying is, if anyone out there is suffering with any kind of depression, or anguish or problems in their life, dont hide it, please just talk about it with somebody and we will see less tragedies like we saw at the weekend. im sure of it.
Better still learn to talk before you need to!
RIP Gary………hope your at peace now xxx
http://www.time-to-change.org.uk/Some lovely words Stefan, well said.. Although i don’t agree with what he’s done, i’m sure he’s in a better place. Rest in Peace, Gary.
His poor wife and children :( They have to live with this forever and the not knowing why will most likely torment them til the day they die, as well as having to cope with their loss and grief.
I do wonder if he has done a Michael from Inxs? Mind boggles.
such a strange situation and he was on TV just a few hours before and nobody even noticed anythin was wrong. whatever was going on to make him do it was very well hidden.
Really does show how important it is to talk to someone if ur feeling low before anything like this happens. if only he’d been able to do just that, such a thing may never have happened.
Perhaps it was depression, perhaps something snapped more suddenly, none of us will ever know and should we speculate?
Whatever it was his children now have to deal with it for a lifetime.
As someone with 2 children who has had his share of low points I can safely say id never deny myself the chance to see them grow up. Id never deny them a father if it was in my power to do so.
Ive seen many eulogizing Gary Speed and others saying its a cowardly and selfish thing to do whatever the reason. I think ill keep my opinion private!And some people are rubbish at ‘talking’ and prefer to deal with things by themselves. Who’s to say whats right or wrong on that one!
@desmondy wrote:
Perhaps it was depression, perhaps something snapped more suddenly, none of us will ever know and should we speculate?
Whatever it was his children now have to deal with it for a lifetime.
As someone with 2 children who has had his share of low points I can safely say id never deny myself the chance to see them grow up. Id never deny them a father if it was in my power to do so.
Ive seen many eulogizing Gary Speed and others saying its a cowardly and selfish thing to do whatever the reason. I think ill keep my opinion private!And some people are rubbish at ‘talking’ and prefer to deal with things by themselves. Who’s to say whats right or wrong on that one!
Some very good points desmo………I personally think it takes someone with great courage to take their own life, how can making that final decision be an act of cowardness…….a majority of people who take their own life are suffering from a mental illness, lots go untreated, as desmo says some ppl prefer to deal with it themselves in stead of seeking help…..theres so much stigma related to mental health illness, especially in men and its time to change.
RIP Gary xx@lucylocket wrote:
I personally think it takes someone with great courage to take their own life, how can making that final decision be an act of cowardness…..
I guess that’s a matter of opinion and mine is that there is alot of bravery in this world whether it be soldiers on the front line on people dealing with disease, and taking your own life isnt one of them. Is there a problem so great that you do this to your family? If you have problems face up to them not take the quick way out and leave it for others to cope with.
No doubt Gary Speed had the means to deal with his problems in the best way. Lots of others don’t have those means yet deal with it nonetheless. If you want an example look at children with cancer, still smiling, still living, still making the most out of it! Now thats inspirational, taking your own life isnt!It is not an act of bravery, neither is it an act of cowardice, it is an act of temporary insanity.
some people are not mentally capable of facing up to their problems and yes its cruel for those of us that are left behind and the impact of suicide on a family is horrific……but the person who takes their own life obviously thinks its the only escape……..and no im not saying suicide is ok because its far from ok I just think some people miss the point that a suicide victim isnt doing it to hurt anyone, it depends on circumstances…….I knw of a woman that was a victim of dosmetic violence for years and years, she was put into safe houses time after time and her husband always found her and talked her into going back, one night she drank witch hazel and took co codamol because she felt it was her only way out and left a heart breaking letter explaining to her family why she cudnt carry on, I dont think she was a coward…….just sayin
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