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7 November, 2011 at 2:03 pm #16870
HugeMember strolled up to Jokecliff and opened his beer bottle in between Jokes Dentures….
”Beer 14 YAY !!!!….. Hey Joke good buddy,, awwww.. don’t look so glum, I know ya just misunderstood… C’mere an gimme a hug, we’ll bond !!! ”, and with that Huge gave Joke an enormous Hug, so hard Joke went turquoise,then patted him on the back sending him hurtling towards alkiarses wheelbarrow, Huge wandered off towards MerryMoronOfNotts,
who was trying to cram as many sausages in his mouth as was humanly possible,,” hey Slim…” shouted Huge,
” save some for the lil people will ya ….. jebus, I didnt know Jabba The Hut was invited ! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! ”
Luckily Jimmy_I’ll_wop_ya was at hand to save any accident occurring and launched himself between Joke and the wheelbarrow, grabbing Joke by his medals and swiftly returned him to an upright position, ” Good job i was fully trained by ninja specialists when working undercover as a macaque monkey in the japanese mountains, for the CIA….”
Penny_fora_guy and Princess_kent were sitting in deckchairs, sipping Mulled wine, and comparing their secret admirers…
” I’m convinced Watchman has the hots for me… he’s always… watching me… sitting there so silent and mysterious.. watching…. watching….I feel his eyes upon me, watching… watching my every move ,,, its only a matter of time before he appears in my box…”
” Funny you should say that,” replied Princess Kenty, ”I have the very same feeling, mind you, I’m not sure how many more lovers i can take on, Thick_Slice wears me out…. He’s such a stud !!! I love nibbling on his bhaji’s ”
PhreeNix didnt really want to be at the party, but was frightened of missing something, and she hadnt had much chance lately to look as if she was ignoring silly ppl and take the higher ground, she needed her fix, however her arm stretching excercises were coming along well, soon she would be able to pat herself on the back when ever she got that smug feeling,
life was good when you were so perfect and all the men adored you… ” cooeeeeeee alkiarse, be nice please and stop calling the ladies a K unt, theres a good boy”….its a tough job, but someone has to be the best, may as well be me.eve_eryThingYouLotLikeI_dont rushed over to JokeCliff ” Jokeyyyyyyyyyy mwahhh xxxxxx Are you free ? would you like to see my bangers ? And I’ll admire your Rocket ?? maybe we could have our own Bonfire Bash !! ”
Just then a traffic cone came hurtling towards them, thrown from some tramp behind a bush, who was wearing a tea cosy.
Luckily Jimmy_I’ll_Wop_You had spotted said traffic cone, and paracuted from a tree in time to catch the missile and re-direct it to a safer destination…
” I knew that refresher course I did with the SAS out in the Himalaya’s would come in handy ….. I also found out the consistency of yak sh!t,,,”
Bellevue had an orgasm.
Clare_dont_dare_me who had drank most of the Punch, out of an old welly and was feeling naughty, snuck up behind Lonnie_the_wig and placed a catherine wheel on his toupee, it melded with the ginger nylon and went spinning off like a gymnastic long haired guinea pig, leaving a few grey wisps blowing in the breeze.
Lonnie was bereft.
Very_Impotant_peanut quickly came to the rescue and whipping off his own toupee, tossed it to lonnie…. ” you have this one, I’m on Plan b” and with that he quickly shoved a large paperbag over his head in an effort to avoid detection…. TunaAnn ( once Tuna_mary) was on the hunt.. No man with a pulse was safe… Even thick slice still had nightmares if anyone mentioned a chicken fillet.
The flying guinea pig had landed on merrymorons (8th) pizza and was never seen again….RosePedalBin, who was wearing her new scholls with thick woolley socks ( because she refused to take them off even if it was November)
was sat between Nice_pies_Fem and Uglyasa_moose drinking cocktails and singing ,” Gin gan goolie goolie goolie watching, theres a few …. at this do ….. hic ”Alkiarse was bearing down on Blonde like a man on a mission… he closed one eye and focused as best he could, determined for a smooch….
Blonde became aware of the fumes from paint thinner and looked up in dismay to see Alki infront of her and smiling.
” HELP !!!!! ” she hollered ” For the love of Marks & Spencer handbags !! somebody save meeee !!!! ”
From out of nowhere, Jimmy_I’ll_wop_you, now wearing only a loincloth and camourflage paint swung on spare vine ( very hanndy) across the bonfire, somersaulted and landed between alki and blonde
” I will save you lovely lady!!!, Have no fear DooWop is here !!! I was once bodyguard to Rolf Harris, on his ‘ Waltzing Matilda tour’, and can wrestle a kangaroo to the ground in 15 seconds using only my mighty, Italian Sausage !!’
which he then whipped out to show her…. Blonde passed out.
Alkiarse had had quite enough of all this and brought down his ‘decent bottle of red £6.99 from Asda’ on Jimmys head, rendering him unconcious.There was a sigh of relief all round……. and HugeMember picked alkiarse up and gave him a smacker right on the lips, then tucked him under is arm and carried him into the bar ” Beer 27 OI lolol and a glass of ya finest meths for ma buddy here….. HAHAHAHAHA !!! ‘
7 November, 2011 at 4:18 pm #482384you’re good =D>
RosePedalBin…………..priceless :lol:
7 November, 2011 at 4:21 pm #482385=D> great writing whatever the content, a great imagination.
7 November, 2011 at 4:51 pm #482386Absolutely love it =D> Soooo funny thanks Coat
7 November, 2011 at 5:13 pm #482387quality 8)
7 November, 2011 at 6:06 pm #482388Hilarious :D
7 November, 2011 at 6:18 pm #482389:D
7 November, 2011 at 8:27 pm #482390I think I’m in chat-love, I want coathanger’s chatbabies . . . . .
7 November, 2011 at 9:12 pm #482391Now – there is an offer you really can refuse :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: is there a smiley face for flacid?
7 November, 2011 at 10:19 pm #482392@camel_blue wrote:
Now – there is an offer you really can refuse :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: is there a smiley face for flacid?
Hey, if the ads are to be believed, I get to be in the same league as Pele in something at least.
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