I had to do it!

Thinking about Easter and the celebration of new life and all that, I decided it was time for me to move on and get rid of an unwelcome visitor.

He moved in last summer, uninvited, really just sort of weedled his way in, he was never really my type infact I never liked his sort but I put up with it for the sake of peace. I’d got some visitors coming for a long weekend one flying from Scotland one flying from Ireland and two from up north somewhere. Stupid of me I know but I hoped they wouldnt be annoyed by his presence and they seemed very accepting of him being there. We didnt talk about it much and had a good time but I felt it was hanging over my head all the time.

Ive always been very independant and find it hard to ask for help but when he had the audacity to ask a mate to move in I knew it was time to get something sorted.

I discussed it with my son and he promised me he would deal with it at Christmas but of course with his girlfriend and the baby here I dont think he wanted to make a scene. I thought of two other blokes I could ask but one has a pacemaker and the other had emptied my loft recently so felt I couldnt impose on them.

Every weekend for the last few months I thought I know I’ll have the courage to get rid of him and his mate once Ive had a glass of wine, I was kidding myself and only ended up with an overflowing recycle bin and knowing nods from the bin men.

I began to question how I’d let him get to me like this, Ive always been strong and fairly logical but I was feeling weak and defenceless. In all honesty he didnt ask for much and some people even liked him, he was quiet and well behaved and it did cross my mind that maybe I should leave well alone. However, the fact that he didnt even ask me if he could move in or pay me any rent was too much to bare and I decided this morning would be his last.

So at 9 Oclock I stood on a kitchen chair to bring me up to his level, turned a 2p coin in the end of the strip light to loosen it , lowered it carefully to the ground, switched on the hoover and promptly sucked him and his mate up into oblivion.

Job done!