I Stood on a Slug and I Liked It

I stamped hard on a slug the size of a giant pregnant mouse today.  It was black (no racism there😮), the fiendish critter was in the middle of my front garden path.  Now I know from years of being  tormented by these slimy little shites, just how resilient they can be.  Hence I lifted my foot high in the air and went for it.

But! On lifting my foot there was nothing there! NOTHING! Not one morsel of splendid slug pulp was there, for me to 0rgasm over!

I was well flummoxed, I can tell you. I scanned the path, and there the slimy little bstard was!  A full 4 feet further along the path IN ONE PIECE, no less!

Not only do the slimy little shits breed with themselves! No REALLY they do. The little bstards bounce ffs!

I gathered myself together, and fetched the garden spade.  I then set to slicing the slimy little bstard in two.

Then I spaded the little fker into the grass.  

FK U SLUGS!  

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Ghost_Child